Woman Impossible

The work - mother balance is an impossible challenge women face today. Whether you are thinking about having your first baby, a stay at home mom, a career woman, or a single mom, the majority of women end up in situations that are imposed, unsupported, or exhausting. In other words, soul crushing.

It’s a topic that we need to collectively address and one that has much healing to undergo.

Most couples don't venture to discuss what roles each parent will take. Many assume the unconscious household roles that made up their childhood or traditions of the past. Some new mothers can't wait to get back to work while others can't bear the thought. And most won't truly know until they are holding a baby in their arms which makes planning for it unreasonable.

Moms who end up at home with baby/children may love it, but even so will get drained by its excess. Financial strains and pressure often lead husbands to disconnect and default the whole load of parenting onto the women, even if she is also working. And she, losing her power and purpose, becomes enslaved. Her needs fall onto deafened ears. So she resigns, as does her libido.

Moms who work can’t avoid a feeling of guilt about spending time away, if not from their own judgement, from other women's (eek) or from society’s. No one wins.

Rising up and gaining equality is not about trying to match men or labeling them as wrong and women as right. It’s about creating a new paradigm. It’s about taking responsibility for ourselves and in doing so demanding a holistic structure to engage with. Women must vision and create for themselves, and do so with opportunity to tend to and nurture. MRS degrees are obsolete.

Let's make decisions that don't sacrifice who we are, let's let go of what a family picture should look like and the roles that come with it, and let's heal this world. Relationships must evolve from codependent to interdependent.

If you are a woman on the planet right now, you are here to help with this shift - be an example, stand up for yourself and your needs, know that you deserve support, and give yourself permission to have a purpose outside of motherhood while mothering. Liberate yourself. And demand that the workforce comply.

And if you’ve lost yourself, this is not the time to give up. It’s time to rediscover who you are and renew your purpose through possibility. Remember, if you have given birth, you can do anything.